Sunday, October 31, 2010

happy halloween.

we dressed as the eyeballs again, super last minute.  lola hated her horse suit so she became a ballerina.

no costume for boda boy this year... boo. first boy i've ever met that doesn't dig dressing up.

Friday, October 29, 2010


..and my self pity debbie downer moment is over. thank goodness. good to reflect on life, but on to the next thing now.

i've discovered a great lame mood cure all is service for others. any kind really will do. just helping someone other than yourself will change your attitude completely. seriously works. that was my big plan for the week: if anyone needed my help i wouldn't say no.  there were plenty of opportunities all week long. this afternoon i watched a friends 3 kids (ages 4, 3, and 9 month old and my own 2 kidlets) i have huge respect for mothers of large families. i don't know how they do it.  not that i minded watching them at all. i was happy to... just juggling the infant with a jealous lola was tricky.

trying to prepare for 3 or 4 halloween parties coming up and still no costume...i was planning the zombie family theme. but everyone in my family said no. one year i'll actually prepare ahead of time to be medusa before all the toy snakes sell out for my wig.  maybe i'll be a set of eyeballs again with merv. lola can wear her horse suit and cody, well he doesn't dress up anyway.

fav running music this week:
everythings magic: angels and airwaves
joy ride: the killers

....and hooray! my baby sister is pregnant!

Thursday, October 21, 2010

love always wins.

this past month or so has been a big fat emotional roller coaster... mostly on the downward slope, and hopefully more of the upward slope from now many times can you fall on your face? really? i've been feeling unconfident in the things i say and do.

i keep trying to remember the personal goals i've given myself and constantly try to work on them: to be a good, true and honest friend,sister wife, mom, to try my best not to gossip or speak unkindly of others,  to compliment at least 3 people or so a day and take a compliment politely when its given, and when i makes mistake to pick myself up brush off and try again, even if it seems i'm taking 3 steps forward and 2 steps back.

i feel like a looser for a lot of reasons, but today for example a smallish one: i missed codys "writing celebration" at school. it was kind of a big deal to him.  "mom, where were you? we had the writing celebration today!!?" ugggg. i could have cried i felt so bad. i promised him frozen yogurt to make up for my lameness and to help patch up his broken heart.

i'm trying my best not to let this blog turn into a big sad story. but sometimes thats real life right? and whats the purpose of this thing anyway? i've always kept a private journal. i've recently considered making this thing private. i might be letting a little too much of myself out there... hmmm, i'll have to think about that some more.

ps. i was looking for a particular photo, which i didn't find (does anyone have tips on ways to organize 428 million photos??) but i did find these cute ones instead.

i forgot she was so fat and small at one time not too long ago.
and this photo of cody, he was 2 here. close to lola's age now.
this photo reminds me of a funny story, gramma lana is always canning something and this day she was canning tomatoes. when i went into her living room to check on him cody said he was helping gramma to can tomatoes.
i just love this one, red eyes and all. sweet babies.


 ...some random pictures throughout the month.
cousins played all day. cody loved it. i love when i told them to act like goofs brinley made those funny things with her fingers behind cody... bug ears? so brinley.

 he seriously looks like a huge kid to me here.
lola was trying super hard to get someone to play with her. but she's at the age where she just drives the big kids nuts.

 "hey guys, look here. a super cool... pumpkin bucket?? anyone?"
 i think brinley is doing witchcraftery in the yard in this one. and good grief, could they drag any more toys out?
 more witchcraftery. this awesome cape has been around since jasmine was her size and she'll be turning 17 in a month... its been a wild success. i cant believe i still let them use it for dress up. its super old and worth a fortune.
 "look ma, a nat!" (...and whats up with the swarms of nats lately??)
"guess ill just play soccer by myself  then."

 "ya, a few more toys and soccer cones in the yard should do the trick. then mom can leave them up and drive the neighbors nuts all week."
skating in the grass is safest.
annual greenbluff trip to get pumpkins. (courtesy of sister)

sad julie, i just found out today that my friend is selling this greenbluff propety (the gorgeous property in this photo...) :(
super random, but just discovered amongst the others : lola loves to chill in this thing. she fights over it with the cousins. its getting to the point that it hardly supports her. but she insists. i guess that about about sums up this really poorly organized and unedited and post.

Friday, October 15, 2010

can you find our house?

..i bought some hummus dip the other day at huckleberries and i kid you not, it tasted exactly like hot dogs. sick! why buy hot dogs when you can by hot dog spread. mental note: pass on the 3.99 special on smoked hummus. especially when your trying to entertain guests....
..i dearly love my sister, and im so thankful we can handle each other enough to deal with a successful ((& very busy))business together. thankful that she looks past my shortcomings. it just me or are people on they're cell phone 24/7. what did we do before cell phones?? did we talk to people for real? another friend made a comment about this and i couldn't agree more. i love it when i'm having a conversation with someone and they start texting in front of you. or browsing the internet on their phone. it took me a while to even come around to the idea of getting a cell phone.
...i've passed my 500 mile mark running. my goal was 500 for the year. running is a big stress reliever for me and i guess i've had a lot of motivation to run this year. i'll be happy when we glide into 2011(!) 2010 can go down in flames with 2007.
and in case you gave a crap...running tunes of the minute:
**anything by passion pit: especially- moths wings, to kingdoms come, dream (another cover song but super rad!! perfect for running!! at like 6.5 mph...)
**mgmt: kids
**the republic tigers: buildings and mountains (also perfect 6.5-7 mph running beat)
**iron & wine: boy with a coin, house by the sea (not a huge fan of their popular stuff...)
snap shots from our recent (and rare) date night. my sister and i did an engagement photo shoot here recently. i loved it and took merv back to see the sites. if you can find our house, you win a milliondy dollaros.
...speaking of date nights, have you seen six feet under yet?? it's a little (or a lot) disgusting and vulgar. but addicting! better to be addicted to a series than crack, right? and dwight schrute is in it! not as dwight schrute of course, but as the real dude, and maybe even a better character... can't wait to start dexter. im an idiot and qued up disc 4 before disc 3 of season 4 on netflix.... uggg. the wait! we've been waiting all non mail delivery holiday weekend for the right disk! we don't watch tv much but this is our midnight guilty pleasure.

Sunday, October 10, 2010

i love my family.

we had such a great weekend...our house was packed. waffles with everyone saturday morning and then last night we had everyone over for girls vs guys trivial pursuit night, (...even though the girls always suck and loose.)  as i was looking around the table, i realized all of my siblings and their spouses there, with the exception of my brother who was at work. it made me very happy. maybe not my neighbors though. we tend to get pretty loud. especially with 8 million children running amok.

time with my family is refreshing and even though it can be tremendously overwhelming it is so worth it to have a large family. i loved having 6 kids in our family growing up. i love them all  individually and i've always made it a priority to maintain a personal relationship with every one of them. my childhood memories would not be complete without my siblings. i would probably only remember parts of my  it if  it weren’t for my sisters & brothers.  maybe its due to the fact that my mom had all 6 of us within 8 years that we are still so close. anyway, im glad we love each other enough to spend so much time together.

Thursday, October 7, 2010

happy lola.

"Are you a princess? I said & she said I'm much more than a princess, but you don't have a name for it yet here on earth. " --Brian Andreas

Tuesday, October 5, 2010


my baby likes to escape on a regular (pretty much daily) basis to the neighbors yard. she knows exactly where they keep the much cooler rides stored.
cody comes home, runs in and asks to play at troys. come to find out they've been working on this awesome masterpiece. legos are the best.
thanks for entertaining my kids, neighbors.

Friday, October 1, 2010

umm.... do i suck at life?

i suppose everyone feels a bit of self doubt every now and then right?  i think its a healthy way of reflecting on ourselves.  am i doing the best i can for myself? no... am i making all the right choices? i a good mom/wife/sister/friend/daughter? errrr not always.   i feel like something is always missing in my life lately. what, im not quite sure. i try to fill the void with stuff. sometimes the wrong stuff.  it drives merv crazy that i am always gogogogogogo!!! to the point of burning out and bringing on more stress.

take running for example(must be the theme of the month....) i'd rather shove a hardcore workout in to 1/2 hour of running my guts out than dally around the gym or do an hour long video. i don't have enough time for an hour. (although slowing it down a notch and adding in some pilates again would do me some serious favors.)

him:"can't we just hang out here at the home we work hard to pay for? i like it here. its my favorite place to be."
me: "i work here all the time, i need a break!!! lets go for a drive, get a treat, go visit someone..." (sometimes when i'm in my house i can't relax because i feel like i have to take care of something, anything!)
him: i think you need to go for a run alone and i'll chill here with the kids.... (said with love and compassion... of course ;)

the longer we're together, the more we understand what works and doesn't for us and each other.
i'm glad he sees that i need a tiny break from life once on awhile. i love him. and i love the life i have. its just a constant growing and changing and evolveing experience. sometimes i feel like im reverting backward instead of moving forward. lately i've really been trying to let things fall where they are suppose to instead of forcing them. it seems to be working.

*photo: blast from the past.. maybe 4 years ago? after a very tumultuous time in our marriage. i cut my hair really short right after this. its hard to tell in the phots, but it was really long and shaggy and actually a really hideous haircut.  i think it was a form of me trying to rid that part of myself when i told the girl to chop it off....  i love this picture.