i recently listened to an incredible speaker. one thing that really stood out... and i've heard it before but the way he said it really made an impact- he said that lifes struggles and trials are meant specifically for us... and how we choose to handle them and work through them will make all of the difference in the world. having a healthy positive outlook and attitude can make or break your life. for real. when we become depressed and give up and cave into negative temptations and addictions- it literally destroys us. i've learned this the hard way more than once. everyone is guilty of making poor decisions at one point or another and i don't think it is healthy to go around beating ourselves up over it. and over analyzing and would have-could have-should have thinking...more important to realize to learn from our mistakes and truly strive to make better choices in the future. anyway. i loved it and have been trying to look at life that way even more than i did before.
i've been trying to really trim down the amount of comparison i do. even when its not intentional. even getting caught up in having too many blogs on my reader list... or following too many photographers sites. you end up doubting yourself. ive tried to limit my reading to people i truly admire, family and close friends... who when i read or look at their images i go away feeling inspired to continue living my own life the best i can and refining my own goals and talents... vs. feeling bad about my own life or what i might not have.. maybe even resentful or jealous.
i really, really loving running!! surprise! the more i do it the more i love it! for physical reasons, but also because its some of the best therapy i've found. i love putting races on the calendar to look forward to. however... i also love it to the point where at times i feel like it could be becoming an addiction. someone told me that addictions are addictions and it's not healthy to have them at all, even if they might be a healthy habit (there is a difference...). if you become too addicted to any one thing, what happens when you can no longer have it? i learned just what that meant when i injured myself running. its been about 6 weeks ago that i noticed my hip was causing me some serious grief. i think i probably over did it at the end of last year and i wasn't taking enough breaks. i ran on it anyway hoping that i could just run through it, to the point that i could hardly walk and would wake up limping. honestly, i've never been the greatest at stretching out of sheer lack of desire, and i probably have a pretty crappy runner diet which i'm sure helped cause it.
so after finally having it checked out and doing some continued physical therapy sessions, i should be good in 3-6 weeks. (blah!!) i've compensated with a lot of the rowing machine and recumbent biking-not quite the same.. and i feel like it's driving me insane!!..but i'm coping and working with it. a lesson learned from a negative situation. i was not listening or taking care of my body the way i should have been. too stubborn to try something else in place of beloved running. i'm now even more thankful for the fact that i even have legs..and arms and planning to take much better care and time stretching, yoga etc.... i keep telling myself that things will work out, and i'll still have plenty of time to train for runs i plan to participate in. but seriously, it's been LAME(!!!!!!!) and a little difficult to adjust to.
i have no idea why this was all blurted out..i'm not even sure that it makes sense. i was in the mood. and it's been a good long while.